How to raise confident Children and fearless Leaders
Should parents give their children enough space to think anything in life is possible, it can be uphill struggle for the child to believe in their own potential. In today's world everything is so scary and unpredictable no one knows what is coming next. So, how will children cope up with this all, where will they learn, how to handle fear and failure. We can say schools or colleges, but I say the only place they can actually learn to be confident is from their parents, they need walk the talk.
In modern society , children are mostly around smartphones and tablets. This can never lead to leadership. First thing - don't give them gadgets to play. They should play on grounds. Sports teach a lot of things. Sports teach - team spirit, confidence and leadership.
Also, let them fail. Let them realize that failure is the part of life and work hard to not to repeat failure.
The problem is - parents know all that I mentioned above but they don't follow it with honesty.
Masarrat A Shah In my extended family I see children being badly spoilt. You want the latest iPhone? New nike trainers? What colour? They reach their final years of education and have never had to support themselves. This breeds the confidence that 'if something goes wrong, my parents will sort it out' and not 'how do I do this for myself?'
Tough love, every time, for me.
I think the question itself needs some tweaking. Focus on courageous leaders rather than fearless. Fearless = unrealistic expectation that can damage confidence. Healthy fear is a survival tool and useful. Paralytic fear is a problem. A big problem in society right now is distorted assessment of one's self efficacy in both extremes. So yes we have people who don't feel they can do anything and underestimate their abilities (moderate problem). The bigger problem is a lot of people (mostly younger people) have an exaggerated sense of their abilities which makes them a little dangerous and if they encounter an epic fail can cause them great psychological damage and total loss of confidence. What I think is best is to instill in children a "growth mindset" and allow them to follow their passions and interests with a sense of taking on challenges. This happens young (in the home) and throughout life (in school and work).
Here are some thoughts about factors:
- Don't tell kids they can do anything because they can't. They can try anything and that is good. The experience becomes data for self knowledge and begins mapping a course.
- Eliminate participation trophies
- Allow more discovery in learning new things and reduce emphasis on prescriptive rote behavior
- Play sports or games where kids get a chance to learn how to lose. And losing should be seen in proper light. It is not a total failure, it is simply feedback on a skill level and preparedness. Encourage them to congratulate and respect the winner.
- Don't tell kids what and why they can't do. Facilitate discovery and let them find out about their strengths and weaknesses as well as interests.
- Encourage delayed gratification in all endeavors
- Encourage more unstructured time, play and learning. Life has become too structured and compartmentalized. This does not prepare people for living in a world with so many unknowns. To the growth mindset individual the unpredictability of the future is an opportunity.
To summarize there are many forces at work here -- parenting, society, education and dare I say technology. Technology has delivered a false promise of everything one needs is available all the time. There is no one answer to the question posed because the question is too broad for one. Good question!
The question is the answer
“How to Raise Children “
All children want and need nurturing.
The wise parent encourages their child
to crawl up hills and finally climb to the mountains top on their own.
Watching all the time as an conscious observer to witness success.
Always waiting for an opportunity to catch their child getting it right and being there to encourage their child to get up again and again and to never give up .
When a parent becomes disappointed or angry due the mistake or bad choices their child will undoubtedly make remember the golden opportunity for a life lesson is at hand.
Use these valued moments to root proper behavior in their child by sharing the example of the right answer.
Parents are the foundation their children will
stand upon to see clearly the path ahead.